“Don’t forget to call Dad”, I said, as I hung up with my son. The last day of college drop off was vivid in my mind. I had planned in advance for this day. In order to be under control emotionally, I had counseled myself for months. I knew the time to say goodbye to our first born would be tough. I kept reminding myself that it was his time to fly. This is the normal path in life. And to enjoy watching them grow into themselves. My son was so excited for his new adventures ahead and I was excited for him. But I was going to miss him terribly, so I knew I had to prepare myself. I had lots of plans on the horizon to keep me busy. So when the time came to say goodbye, I held back the tears and did not cry. I actually held myself together.
Unexpected Curveball
What I did not expect was my husband starting to cry — and insisting that we leave immediately. This was an unexpected curveball in my personal mental game plan. It never occurred to me that he would be hit as hard as me. And clearly he did not anticipate his own feelings either. So we left abruptly with both of us teary eyed during the drive home. Now I had to worry about his emotional well-being too.
Keep Dad in the Loop
As a parent of three, each time one of my kids left the nest for college, I reminded them to stay in touch with their dad as well. “Don’t forget to call dad”, I repeated. Kids instinctively text or call their mothers when they need something or want to talk. But this can unknowingly make a father feel left out. They have developed their own bonds with each child as well. And while they seem cool on the outside, they are definitely emotionally sad about reaching this milestone as well. Let your child know it’s a good idea to text or call their dear old dad once in a while. They may have different issues to discuss together, which can help your child better navigate their complex college world.
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